Synastry Studies ✦ Dawn Bodrogi ✦ The Inner Wheel
Please read Part 1 and Part 2 of The Roving “I” before this piece. It’s important to understand the concepts behind the angles before taking in the information below.
I normally don’t do these cookbook type lists — but here are some observations gleaned from almost 20 years of doing synastries. These are common problems. The list is certainly not comprehensive. Many other issues can arise.
Relationship Challenges and Blind Spots for the Signs on the Asc/Desc Axis
Aries Asc / Libra Desc
So busy moving forward that relationship needs are not acknowledged, leading to neglect. Looking for the sweetest or most complacent partner, only to discover that kitty has claws. Attracted to what society finds most appealing, only to realize it isn’t what was really wanted or needed. Not realizing that compromise and give and take in relationship can be rewarding. Not acknowledging own need for down time and peace.
Must learn: how to involve the partner. Unacknowledged need: to connect and include. Unacknowledged behaviour: seeking approval.
Taurus Asc / Scorpio Desc
Trying to keep the partner under lock and key, then shocked when deceived. Not acknowledging the powerful regenerative forces in sexual relationships, leading to complacency. Becoming lost in sensuality for its own sake, not acknowledging the deep psychological forces at work. Trying to keep everything contained, until it’s too late.
Must learn: fearlessness, and to trust the eternal rebirth of life energy. Unacknowledged need: for powerful, transformative experience. Unacknowledged behaviour: destructive and self-destructive tendencies.
Gemini Asc / Sagittarius Desc
Attracted to instinctive partners who do their own thing, without bothering to discover own wisdom. Following because it’s easier. Not acknowledging desires to feel free and unfettered, to explore and understand. Keeping busy to avoid committing. Need to develop instinct. Needs to appreciate nature and the natural order of the world.
Must learn: the validity of belief. Unacknowledged need: to discover and follow own truth; to have a purpose. Unacknowledged behaviour: compromising the truth; unwilling to complete anything.
Cancer Asc / Capricorn Desc
Attracted to competent, stable, capable, take-charge types. Letting others call the shots without acknowledging one’s own relationship needs. Partnership for status or security. Providing the nurturing in relationship while partner provides the material needs. Treating partner like a child.
Must learn: how to initiate and work towards goals. Unacknowledged need: to become one’s own master, to take responsibility for oneself. Unacknowledged behaviour: need to control partner; manipulation for gain.
Leo Asc / Aquarius Desc
Tendency to choose younger or more easily led partners who suddenly rebel or leave. Need for equality in relationship. Need to learn detachment — that the partner is a person in themselves and not a reflection of one’s own ego needs. Need to be open and honest, to be real, and not to play a role. Balance heart and head.
Must learn: detachment and discrimination in choosing partners; to step out of the limelight for the greater good. Unacknowledged need: to let go of relationship drama. Unacknowledged behaviour: love ’em and leave ’em; self-absorption.
Virgo Asc / Pisces Desc
Attracted to the artistic, weak, mystical, religious, poetic, or wounded. Falling in love with the elusive or unattainable. Longing for perfect love. Relationships can create crises of consciousness through mystical experiences — entire world view can change. Making sacrifices, giving up too much for partnership.
Must learn: to compromise; nothing is perfect. Unacknowledged need: to inspire and be inspired, to be connected to something greater. Unacknowledged behaviour: refusal to be known deeply; desire to hide; inability to commit to creating something concrete; valuing dreams above reality.
Libra Asc / Aries Desc
Attracted to self-starters, people who know where they’re going. Bends over backwards so far their feet leave the ground. Can be afraid to be alone — identity comes from being part of a couple. Too many compromises lead to lack of self-knowledge, particularly regarding partnership. Unacknowledged aggression, passive aggressive behaviours. “If I’m nice enough, everyone will love me.”
Must learn: to speak up for oneself, and honestly. Unacknowledged need: to act for oneself, to feel legitimate with one’s own plan and motives. Unacknowledged behaviour: willfulness, selfishness.
Scorpio Asc / Taurus Desc
Attracted to constant, stable, earthy types. Can overdo sensuality. Unacknowledged positioning for power in relationship. Controlling behaviour. Keeping secrets from partner. Intractable. Refusal to compromise.
Must learn: to relax and enjoy what is for its own sake. Unacknowledged need: to gather and build. Unacknowledged behaviour: fear of letting go.
Sagittarius Asc / Gemini Desc
Attracted to movers and shakers, people with connections, information gatherers, people who communicate easily. Need for freedom can become excessive. Roving loner can end up partner-less. Can use search for inner truth as a mask for not committing. Inability to follow through.
Must learn: to communicate what’s important. Unacknowledged need: to be informed, to connect with others. Unacknowledged behaviour: superficiality, restlessness, lack of commitment.
Capricorn Asc / Cancer Desc
Can be obsessed with following own goals and ambition. Attracted to nurturing, very emotional, or child-like types. May be too attached to the mother archetype. Avoidance of intimacy. Letting partner provide all the emotional support for the relationship.
Must learn: how to nurture, particularly the partner’s goals and needs. Unacknowledged need: to take good care of oneself. Unacknowledged behaviour: clinging, secrecy, emotional manipulation.
Aquarius Asc / Leo Desc
Attracted to creative, dynamic partners. Partners must be the best at whatever they do. Lets partners play out the drama of relationship while Aquarius plays the logical one.
Must learn: to express feeling, allowing the heart to lead. Unacknowledged need: to stand out in a crowd. Unacknowledged behaviour: rigidity, ordering partners to live life according to own ideals; elitism.
Pisces Asc / Virgo Desc
Attracted to grounded, reasonable types who are reliable. Wanting things for the greater good, but not willing to do the work. Continually changing courses, abandoning one path for another. Dependent on partner to take care of the boring details. Needs to learn to turn inspiration into something concrete, to experience completion.
Must learn: discrimination in all things; to make choices based on what’s real while retaining inspiration. Unacknowledged need: to be good at something, to contribute something concrete. Unacknowledged behaviour: inability to choose, helplessness, dithering, feeling nothing is worthwhile.
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Almost 20 years of synastries — and these patterns keep returning. The axis never lies.
How does one factor in having a natal (and progressed) 7th house Sun when it comes to using the DSC to project things on a partner?
Am I looking for my purpose/self in a partnership? Am I depending on the partner too much to show me my sun?
Having the Sun in the 7th house can be a very positive thing. It breaks some of the ‘darkness’ of the Descendant, some of the shadow. The danger of the 7th house Sun is that you can always look to ‘other’ for self-development, for growth through relationship with ‘other’ and sometimes this just isn’t possible. But 7th house Suns are usually types that like to call the shots in relationship and go their own way, depending on the rest of the chart. If there is a huge emphasis on that side of the chart (from houses 4 through 10, but especially houses 5 through 8), there may be too much emphasis on partnership and individual growth may be neglected.
I don’t think anyone needs to show us our Suns. Our Suns create the circumstances of our lives, and a 7th house Sun does throw the emphasis on partnership as a spiritual experience. However, we aren’t good partners unless the other elements of our lives are being fulfilled, including self-direction, so balance is crucial.
In essence, the Scorpio/Taurus polarity must be experienced and balanced. Questions about who am I, what do I need, what do I want and how do I go about getting it will be important. I need to be strong in my essential self (and that will be tested) but I also need to learn to value others, and their experience. Check the second and eighth houses for more information.
Hi Dawn,
Very good information – thank you!
A bit unclear for me – Asc/Dec axes you’ve described are the natal chart ones, or the progressed?
It makes perfect sense the progressed chart existence/analysis but since it’s changing all the time, what percentages you give in synastry for relevance from the “natal charts synastry” and “progressed charts synastry” – is it 50-50 or… I have Cancer/Capricorn (in natal) and Leo/Aquarius in progressed and i am not sure which is what? The same for the planets’ aspects… which again are changing – which are stronger – the natal or the progressed?
Thank you!
There is no easy answer here Julie. I teach an entire course in the use of Progressions in Synastry, and I wish it were a lot longer than six sessions. The natal chart is your essence, it’s the key, but the progressed chart is your soul in movement. Theyre both important, but one is fleeting. Think how quickly the progressed Moon moves (1 degree per month) and the sun (1 degree per year). Progressed contacts have a temporary influence. Still, they are powerful.